In IPL 4, something beautiful happened. We had the most fun one could have with a fully-clothed Preity Zinta…

Read below for our director’s cut, play-by-play commentary of the greatest sporting moment of our time… *UPDATE*: if video doesn’t play, open in new window and pray to Sachin.

0:18: Preity Zinta make her first appearance. Note how she tries to create an emotional bond with the holiest, most tranquil man on earth by laughing along to his genteel comment. That laugh was faker than Shane Warne’s hair.

0:34: Note the man and lady behind the Dalai Lama, who both seem to settle on common ground – namely that listening to His Holiness for a few minutes might be worth sacrificing a Piyush Chawla over for.

0:55: Guy in funny hat nearly falls over.

1:43: “Refer to my previous answer, where I addressed the exact same question, you pea-brained, perfectly-dimpled human.”

2:27: A hand gesture that suggests “I really don’t need to be here.”

2:47: MEE-FUCKING-YEEAOW! The tension between these two ladies should have by now spilled over into a full-on bare-knuckle brawl, but their mutual gritted-teeth tension is somewhat offset by the presence of you know, a guy who tends to frown upon violence.

2:52: The Dalai Lama begins to fidget.

2:55: Preity Zinta feels that her take on the day’s weather (“it’s really good”) would be more interesting than say, the Dalai Lama’s thoughts on the infinite consciousness of man.

3:40: “Any message to cricketers and cricket fans around the world?”

“Yes Preity, I do have a message: if you want to experience higher realms of existence, then please stop watching this IPL nonsense.”

4:16: Preity retreats to powder her nose. The pitchside reporter was never seen of again.

Incidents such as this are exactly what makes the IPL watchable: it’s reality TV, it’s car-crash TV, but with the most famous cricketers in the world. And if you will watch the IPL, you should definitely listen to our full preview!


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